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There’s a Fly in the Ointment

Let’s talk flies. May as well. It appears we have nothing better to do in the Capital, across the country, in the blogosphere, or through the media. Certainly swatting flies is more exciting than listening to 19 senators asking the same questions, duplicating matching diatribes, or harping on inconsequential matters in the confirmation hearing for Judge Sonia Sotomayor. Smoke and mirrors with the Wizard of Oz behind the curtain would likely sum up a process that was essentially nonexistent until 1955. Perhaps it should have stayed that way. Watching paint dry would be more stimulating and less time consuming. I certainly would not want to be a fly on that wall.

Or apparently any wall in the vicinity of our President. I can appreciate President Obama’s irritation with the annoying fly in question as he sat through a lengthy CNBC interview while the pest buzzed around his head. For PETA to take him to task for what it termed the execution of the “smallest and least sympathetic animals” was almost as entertaining as watching Vice President Dick Cheney defend the former administration’s policy on torture and terror. I know that administration terrified me. And it was torture listening to Mr. Cheney talk out of both sides of his mouth.

However, getting back to the notorious “fly incident”, try to wring some sympathy for a fly from the farmers and ranchers around the world. The transmission of pathogens (viruses, bacteria, fungi, protozoa, and nematodes) picked up by flies from garbage, sewage and other sources of waste, and then transferred on their mouthparts, through their vomit, feces and contaminated body parts to human and animal food is most unpleasant. Should the CNBC studios sanitize their facilities to prevent future incidents? All I can say is I hope President Obama washed his hands after the murder.

Perhaps a remake of The Fly is suitable under the circumstances. The fly wins I believe. Or sort of wins, at least in the 1986 version. During a teleportation experiment a human is merged with a fly and the fly’s genetics dominate the human’s genes. What an interesting concept. This week I understand the President was immortalized in a fake plastic fly portrait. How appropriate as a living fly’s lifecycle is short, seven to ten days, under optimal conditions. How long do you suppose a plastic fly lasts? If merged with a human, would the result ever require plastic surgery?

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